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Flight

In two days I'm going to get on a plane and fly back home.

I landed in Australia Sept. 7 of last year, and so have managed to miss the one year mark by a week. Not bad.

Opportunity

When I left to Australia I had three goals: 1) was to get to Australia, so really that one just did itself. 2) was to buy a camper van and live in it for a while, which I did four months ago when I decided to leave Darwin. 3) was to leave with more money that I came with.

Discovery

When I get home and pay off my credit card I will have exactly $37.50 Australian, $2.38 Canadian, 53 cents American, 20 cents New Zealand and 1000 Columbian Pesos.

Passion

Duty

Beauty

I'll probably spend the Australian dollars on Haribos in the airport anyway so basically I did not manage to complete my 3rd goal. Or did I.

Extacy

When I first came over to Australia, a naive boy with $10,000 in my bank account, I told myself I wanted to make more money than I came with, that had been my goal. But, after ups and downs, loves and heart breaks, friends and enemies, solitude and cramped hostels, tears and smiles, passions and hopeless ventures, I think it is safe to reword my goal.

Innocence

I didn't want to come back with more money, I wanted to come back richer.

I left Montreal a 19 year old English boy who'd spent half his life growing up in French Canada with no idea where he belonged or where his home was. Depressed and alone, surrounded by symbols of alienation of his own creation. Lost.

So I landed terrified. With nothing to be scared of. Judged by no one but myself.

But a trip across a nation has taught me many lessons that, funnily enough, lead back to old proverbs.

"Home is where the heart is"

A truth I never recognized until I flew half a world away from everyone I knew. 

Home is not a place, but I feeling. It's a warmth that steals the chill of loneliness and replaces it with the comfort of acceptance. Anywhere can be home.

I've spoken to many people on my travels. From the drunken hostel dweller to the small town Australian who sees no need to leave his island. I've heard countless prejudices, encountered incomprehensible personalities and done things I would never once have thought myself capable. 

Awe

And from that I've learned that everyone is insecure. Behind the facades of smooth talking assholes, made up party girls, chilled out junkies, elitist intellectuals, Old self made men and washed up dole workers, there is an inherent insecurity. And it is human. 

So, after realizing that, what can you do. Fight it, well that never worked before. Ignore it, nah that never helps. I've accepted it.

In Montreal, everyone seemed to know what they were doing and I never seemed a part of it. It made me feel homeless and unwanted. But no one knew what they were doing, they were all as lost as me. 

I left Montreal a poor 19 year old boy, lonely, with $10,000 dollars in the bank. I will return a 20 year old man, back to the smiles and love that had always been there, to the bright days and warm nights of family, to the laughter and excitement of friends and to the opportunity and good life I could never recognize. But most of all I will return home with $0 in my bank, the richest man I know.  

Revelation

My blog ends here. Thanks for reading

- James